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ElmGene 11-06-071 |
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Generation iY Our
Last Chance to Save Their Future Tim
Elmore Growing
Leaders, Inc., 2010, 220 pp. ISBN 978-0-578-06355-3 |
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Dr. Tim Elmore is Founder
and President of Growing Leaders, an Atlanta-based non-profit organization
created to develop emerging leaders. Generation
iY is the younger Millennials, born after 1990. They have grown up with ipods,
iphones, and the internet, in a world that allows
for high speed, constant connection, sedentary lifestyles, pitiful relational
skills, and a large dose of narcissism. (15)
Elmore gives suggestions for guidance within each chapter. 2. Adjusting the Sails - A Closer Look at Generation iY The point of the book is to
illustrate the changes in young people and how we must adjust to help
them. "They need
direction--mentors who engage them in a relevant way, channel their energy,
and provide them with the challenges they need." (18) A college survey reveals
that many are overwhelmed with stress, some from pressures their parents put
on them to succeed and others who had undue comfort and a lack of healthy
pressure prior to college. They are
over connected with much noise, busyness, connection, talk, volume, and
speed, but many are miserable in relationship skills, emotional intelligence,
patience, listening, and conflict resolution.
Many have been sheltered
and overprotected and are unready for life in the real world. Some overestimate their own importance and
feel entitled to special treatment.
They can be narcissistic, me-centered, impatient, demanding, and
short-tempered, having a poor work ethic and minimal long-term
commitment. They are activists and
also slackers, wanting to change the world -- if it can be done quickly. Waiting is very hard. 3. Aftershock
- Responding to the Cultural Shift The Jekyll-and-Hyde Generation
of Paradox
Raised as consumers, many
have not become contributors. At the
same time they are happy to give away their time and money. Because most of their relational contact
comes through technology they are in danger of becoming isolated. They like connecting without having to
really connect. It's hard to build
real relationships in a virtual world.
They are ambitious but anxious.
Some have had too much external structure and are unable to practice
independent reflection or coping or acting without consensus. Some were raised in families where no one
told them 'no' about anything and they feel entitled. Everybody got a ribbon and they never had a
chance to lose. They are connected
mostly with each other, get most of their guidance from their peers, and
model themselves after others from their own generation. But they don't know how to relate to other
generations. They are passionate
about causes that are in fashion but they have short attention spans. They are fuzzy, not focused. When they get bored they quit. Technology has both
accelerated and delayed their maturity.
They know a lot very young but they are not ready for real people,
waiting, responsibility, and the real world.
Some descriptive words include artificial, homogenous, guaranteed,
superficial, programmed, and narcissistic. (48) How to get through to this
group: 1. They want to belong before they believe. 2. They want an experience
before an explanation. 3. They want a cause before
they want a course. 4. They want a guide on the
side before they want a sage on the stage.
5. They want to play before
they pay. 6. They want to use but not
be used by others. 7. The want a
transformation, not merely a touch. (49-51) "To connect with and
influence Generation iY, we'll likely have to
adjust to them…over and over again." (51) 4. Tollbooth or Roadblock? - Why iY Kids are Getting Stuck in Adolescence "The years between
eighteen and twenty-five have become a distinct life state--a strange,
transitional 'no man's land' between adolescence and adulthood in which young
people stall for a few extra years, putting off adult
responsibility." (54) Guys seem unable to commit to marriages,
families or long-term jobs. They don't
want to get tied down to an unsuitable job but to experiment with different
careers. Adulthood seems
overwhelming. The new doorway to
adulthood is having your first child.
The median age is 27. Twenty
six is the new eighteen. All the years
of school have not prepared them for work-life. Children mature in four areas: biological,
cognitive, social, and emotional. This
generation of young people is advanced in the first three areas but backward
emotionally. They know too much too
soon. In the real world success is
about 25% IQ and 75% EQ (emotional intelligence). "What an adolescent
needs is an adult (parent, teacher, coach, employer, pastor, or leader) who
makes appropriate demands and sets appropriate standards for them in a
responsive environment of belief and concern.
In short, they need adults to display a balance of two elements--they
need them to be both responsive and demanding." (66) They need a balance of autonomy -- to act
independently-- and responsibility -- to be accountable. Some suggestions:
5. Lost in Neverland - The Special Challenges of iY
Boys Boys are falling
behind. One-third of young men ages 22
to 34 still live at home with their parents!
Some husbands veg with video games all
evening. There is a lack of male role
models. Six reasons boys may be in
trouble: They are glued to the
screen. School teaching methods are
inappropriate. They are over medicated. It's something in the plastic. Parents hold on too tightly. They are confused about what it means to be
a man. (79) 6. Volcanoes and Karaoke - The Struggle of a New Generation of Parents The butterfly must
experience the struggle of breaking out of the cocoon. We can disable our youth from maturing into
adulthood by helping them too much. Teachers
say that "parents" are their number one headache. Eight damaging parental
styles: ·
Helicopter
parents hover over their kids insuring they have no difficulties and
preventing them from learning to fail and to persevere. ·
Karaoke parents
try to emulate the generation and be their buddies; they fail to earn their
respect. ·
Dry-Cleaner
parents drop them off for others to raise or fix them, failing to mentor
their children. ·
Volcano parents
erupt without warning all over the school authorities. ·
Dropout parents
give up, maybe staying around or maybe pulling out, failing to provide a role
model. ·
Bullied parents
are beaten down, whipped by their kids, surrendering authority. ·
Groupie parents
idolize their children, making 'stars' of their glorious offspring, lavishing
everything on them and denying them nothing. ·
Commando
parents focus on compliance and perfection rather than being satisfied with
growth and improvement. 7. Elephant Lessons - Amending the Lies We Have Told Generation iY We have told them lies to
help them feel good about themselves.
We have told them they can be anything they want to be, everything is
their choice, they are outstanding, they can have it all now, they are
winners (just for showing up), they can get anything they want, and so
on. "False beliefs are not a
healthy way to produce a generation of upstanding adults." (121) 8. My Crystal Ball - Predictions for Generation iY in the Workplace ·
They want a top
level job that fits their passion and they're willing to wait for the
"right" job. They may not be
willing to work their way up. They
struggle with reality. ·
Because of
their capability with technology, they will probably challenge the way you do
things and suggest out-of-the-box ideas.
Wise employers will be alert to fresh ideas. ·
There may be a
lot of disappointment and even depression looming in the workplace. This generation will need people to serve
as a coach. ·
Their parents
may get involved in their work life. ·
They will
expect lots of changes and challenges and will find it difficult to endure,
so flexibility will be a great help. ·
They are
looking for meaning as much as money and will want to see how their effort benefits
a worthwhile cause. ·
They will
expect reward quickly and frequently.
They need constant and instant feedback because they have often been
praised and rarely criticized. So work
at the relationship and provide as much feedback as possible. ·
They expect
both influence and affluence. They
expect a large salary quickly. "If you hope to be
relevant to the world around you, you'll need to invite Generation iY to work on your mission with you. They will likely appear at your front door
looking much like a 'free agent.'" (137)
"They fully expect to dictate some of the terms of their working
conditions, and they may quit if they don't get what they want." (Since they are living with their parents,
they can afford to.) "The key to
attracting the best among them and keeping them as employees is to create an
environment that is familiar and intriguing." (140)
9. The Hinge of History - What We Can Expect from Generation iY Worldwide 10. A
Compass, Not a Map - Helping
Generation iY find Their Future How do we steer Generation iY back on course?
"The best first step is to enable them to discover their
vocation--to recognize their passions and strengths and use them to engage
the world around them." (157)
Challenge them to seize the opportunities to make a contribution. Focus on purpose. Ignite them with a vision for their
future. Challenge them to solve a
problem and make a difference. It's
about a mission. Help them think
through five critical decisions: 1.
What are my
values? Values keep a person on course
as they pursue a vision. Note that
there are virtually no absolute values and often internal inconsistencies in
their values. Many don't trust
business leaders but they think it's ok to cheat on their taxes. 2.
What vision do
I want to pursue? 3.
What is my
strength - combination of talents, gifts, knowledge, and skills? 4.
What is the
best venue for me? 5.
What vehicles
will help me reach my goal? 11. The Care
and Feeding of a New Generation -
EPIC Ideas for Educating iY Students How do we gain an audience
and become relevant with this generation?
Use the acronym EPIC. ·
Experiential. Communication must include multiple
senses. Memorable experiences get
through. ·
Participatory. They want to express themselves and learn
through dialogue. They support what
they help create. ·
Image-rich. This is a visual generation. ·
Connected. They want to learn together, not alone, to
be connected to technology and one another. Traditional
teaching cannot compete. Right brain
stimulation is needed in the conceptual age.
"In other words, the future will increasingly reward what we
commonly think of as 'right brain' thinking.
And iY kids thrive on this kind of
thinking. They are nonlinear. They prize relationships. They love to make connections between
people and ideas and to get their hands on what they're learning about. They thrive on pictures and stories, and
their eyes glaze over when requested to just sit still and read or
listen." "More and more our world is driven by right-brain thought:
imagination, story, music." (177)
Communicators must begin where the audience lives. 12.
Save The Future - Unleashing Their Leadership Potential In
Generation iY: Leadership
is leveraging my influence for a worthwhile cause." (191) |
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